(Translation) 仮想の君の都 || 幽閉サテライト

I have a lot to say about this song. (Take a look at the bottom of the post~)

仮想の君の都 [The Capital of You in My Imagination]
original: 天空の花の都
arrangement: Autobahn
lyrics: かませ虎
vocals: senya
album: 魂の語りに導かれて
circle: 幽閉サテライト


ここに君の名前を付けた
僕の『君』を育もう
愛しさを超えて
己を高みに… それが今の
僕の精一杯

koko ni kimi no namae o tsuketa
boku no “kimi” o hagukumou
itoshisa o koete
onore o takami ni… sore ga ima no
boku no seiipai

I attached your name to this place,
bringing up my own picture of “you”.(*1)
Outpacing affection
and elevating oneself(*2)…That is the best
I can do right now.

ここは僕が僕でいられる
誰も否定はさせない
仮想の世界で 笑いかけてくれ
それだけでいい 言葉は要らない

koko wa boku ga boku de irareru
daremo hitei wa sasenai
kasou no sekai de warai kakete kure
sore dake de ii kotoba wa iranai

This place allows me to be who I am.(*3)
I won’t let anyone annihilate it.
I would be content by just having you smile at me
in my imaginary world. I don’t need any words.

守り守られる二人だった
僕も共にそこに居たかった
痛みを僕に分けてほしかった
なんて今更…

mamori mamorareru futari datta
boku mo tomo ni soko ni itakatta
itami o boku ni wakete hoshikatta
nante imasara…

I protected you and you protected me.
You and me were both right there.
I longed to share your pain
and yet…

最後の会話の君の声を
思い出せないほど突然に
君はここじゃない場所へ向かった
最後君はどんな顔をしてた…?

saigo no kaiwa no kimi no koe o
omoidasenai hodo totsuzen ni
kimi wa koko ja nai basho e mukatta
saigo kimi wa donna kao o shiteta…?

I can’t remember how you talked
during our last conversation, because
too suddenly I confronted a place without you.
What kind of face have you made in the end…?

君は決してこんな僕を
望みはしない 分かってる

kimi wa kesshite konna boku o
nozomi wa shinai wakatteru

I know that you would have never
wished for me to be like this.

失う反動
情けない でもまだ
千切れないな 千切ろうともしない

ushinau handou
nasakenai demo mada
chigirenai na chigirou tomo shinai

Losing any backlash
is shameful, but yet
I’m not torn to pieces, and I’m not going to be.

部屋に残る君の声で
いつも泣きたくなるんだ
嘆きに身体を委ねて仮想の君の都
閉じこもっていたい…

heya ni nokoru kimi no koe de
itsumo nakitaku narunda
nageki ni karada o yudanete kasou no kimi no miyako
tojikomotte itai…

Your voice lingering in my room
always makes me want to cry.
Devoting my body to grief, I want to lock myself
inside the capital of you in my imagination…

何も誤魔化さない二人だった
ささやかを極めるはずだった
思い出を繰り返し語るんだ
呆れるほどに

nanimo gomakasanai futari datta
sasayaka o kiwameru hazu datta
omoide o kurikaeshi katarunda
akireru hodo ni

There was no need for us to falsify anything.
We were supposed to be choosing modesty.
I recite our memories over again
until they amaze me.

最後の会話の君の声を
思い出せないほど突然に
君はここじゃない場所へ向かった
最後君はどんな顔をしてた…?

saigo no kaiwa no kimi no koe o
omoidasenai hodo totsuzen ni
kimi wa koko ja nai basho e mukatta
saigo kimi wa donna kao o shiteta…?

I can’t remember how you talked
during our last conversation, because
too suddenly I confronted a place without you.
What kind of face have you made in the end…?


Lily.White.full.791306


Firstly, I’d like to direct my whole gratitude towards Releska for explaining how to understand the first verses, and saying how to translate some parts! (*⌒▽⌒*)θ~♪

Understanding the concept of the song proved quite difficult; of course the main topic was clear from the beginning: “boku” grieving over the death of “kimi”. Yet, there were some parts that left room for interpretation and needed some acute analysis:


ANNOTATIONS
I know the title is a reference to “天空の花の都”. I understand the “仮想の” to be a “仮想に”.
(*1) First of all: kimi’s name is unknown. All we know is boku named his capital after kimi. So by “bringing up his own version of you“, boku visualises his capital, not kimi.
(*2) Releska said how he is torn between 己 being “myself”, “yourself” or “oneself” (because “me” and “you” are already taken by “boku” and “kimi”). After some thinking I would come to the conclusion it’s a) a general act or b) boku elevating kimi (because boku is loving that person). Since this part is seemingly meant to be vague, I chose “oneself” how Rele suggested~
(*3) This verse shows how important the place is, by assigning it a は.
How I interpret the song:
It’s a difficult task to deal with sorrow and grief of having lost someone you loved. Some lose all their joy and happiness, others stay strong and go on without shedding more tears than needed. Others lose any sense in living and perceive the world as empty and dull. If the mental stress is too heavy, some people tend to enforcedly blend out the outside world and build up their own little world in their minds; an imaginary world.
Boku is exactly like that and builds up an idyllic city in his mind, hopelessly believing everything is alright there. The reason for doing so is two: regret and consternation. Kimi died too suddenly; apparently (s)he was alright when boku last saw him/her (so maybe an accident?). If boku had time to prepare for kimi’s death, the reaction would have been different. The “regretful” thing is boku not remembering details about the last time he met kimi (e.g. the voice). He regrets to having the time he spent with kimi seen as casual and believing they would go on forever like this. So boku is frantically trying to imagine how kimi’s last moments were like, how (s)he felt, what (s)he thought… The distress and incomprehension of being unable to know the reality of something that bothers you (here: the last moments of a beloved person) is one aspect of this song, right after sorrow and grief. In my eyes, that is~

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One comment

  1. I learned a new word today! Perfect word, by the way.

    Consternation – Feelings of anxiety or dismay, typically at something unexpected.

    Thanks for the translation! 😀

    Like

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